September 
10 [sun] hiiiii its been a while. im finally back wanting to actually do stuff with this website! about two weeks into school as well. its my senior year and we got a bunch of work to do immediately, but ive been doing it all as soon as possible kind of abnormally HAHA, not sure what changed but i really appreciate the distraction now. i LOVE my chemistry class, it's so interesting. he already expects us to know the periodic table! we've supposed to have been studying in our own time apparently. this would be frustrating if i weren't completely nuts about science stuff.
uhh our apartment flooded! the drywall is totally dead n they have to rip down the ceilings and walls and stuff so we've been relocated. today i got a bedframe!!!! my room is starting to look less like a "prison" (thank you Carson). Whenever someone will help me lug my desk up I won't really care about anything else. It's been kind of fun, yesterday I went out in the middle of the night and came back with a backpack full of chopsticks, coffee mugs, sandwich bags, tea lights, a bottle cap opener, etc.
Hm. Remember when I talked about being afraid of becoming reliant on other people? Well I wouldn't call it that, but I've become startlingly normal. Some upsetting stuff happened and I cried for two days.. the catharsis kicked in and now i feel totally fine. but anyways i am so fucking suprised??? and grateful. something mattered. i was able to make an attachment, able to be hurt. i only have the people who have come into my life to thank for this. im still in the home that got me all repressed but only for a year or two more
ive started making a comic! ill share it here if im ever proud of it :)
im finally in the (visual) art class at the art school... it's only my last year..... sigh. miscommunications kept me out of it. annoying. when i was able to speak to the teacher last year she was so confused that id never been in it then placed me at the highest level after getting my portfolio HA
never trusting school counselors again
14 [thu] i've been having so much fun with art lately!!!!!!!!!! i did some (a lot) of figure studies then went and sketched random stuff like normal the next day and it is genuinely criminal how much using references for one night helped my understanding of how parts are connected and like muscles and stuff.. weight/flow??! i feel like ive been scammed/wasted so much time... hopefully my time spent improvising left me with other skills??????
i am so excited for halloween. like batshit (sjkfhjs bats)
ALSO I KIND OF LIKE MADE SOME MORE FRIENDS... got added to a group chat w/ 9 ppl lmao. it's a shame this is my last year, i hope i'll find people in college.
I haven't been remembering my dreams lately but still waking up with like vague feelings, ALMOST concepts left over?? i can't get better at retaining these if i have nothing to write down! wtf brain
I FOUND FIONA AND CAKE LAST WEEKEND.. ITS EVERYTHING if youve seen adventure time and dont know about it please go try it wow
20 [wed] SO MUCH SCHOOL WORK JESUS
been taking an unofficial break from my comic.. i uploaded two pages before upload day then nothing on upload dayyy..????? sooo??? i kind of wasn't inconsistent? haha.. anyway i finally planned the new few pages so ill have those done b4 this friday im sure. ARGH procrastinating an essay rn. eeeueuueueueeu
ive not been super good lately but today is a good day. and it's 62F!
